Oh the Stories I Could Tell!

So now that I am separated from my previous employer, I can tell some of the stories that I have mentioned to friends, but until now, haven't published anywhere.

I had an assistant, Matilda that I constantly entertained me. I will miss hear and her young, naive, narrow minded perspective on life.

Before I left the company, Matilda told me that she has always wanted to be a stripper. Yes, this assistant is LDS and is 20 and married...in the temple. She went on to say that back when she was 16 she would tell her mom that she wanted to be a stripper. She was convinced that she would make tons of money and be very happy since she would be the center of attention and everyone would stop what they were doing and just watch her dance around. She said she still thinks she should do it, not tell her husband and start working at a strip club. She would be able to make all kinds of money and be able to pay off her car, her student loan and pay for her husband's schooling.

When I heard her vocal daydream, I stopped and asked, "so you don't mind random dirty men putting their hands on you?"

She responded, "they wouldn't touch me! They aren't allowed!"

That is when I couldn't control the laughter any longer and answered, "how do you think you make tips?"

Sadly, her face sank. "What? They let them do that? I would slap them...but then I probably wouldn't make much on tips."

"Well, there are certain places where the men like being slapped and you could make money."

Matilda then asked what I meant by that and where to find these places. As an LDS individual who really has no affiliation with that lifestyle explained that there are places where people like it a bit more rough and that opened the floodgate of questions. After defining several things that I know little about, Matilda decided that her idea of the stripper lifestyle was much better and that if she could do it her way, that would be a much better option.

Personally, I am convinced that she didn't believe me and that in her mind, she still believes that her idea of that lifestyle is how it really is.

Poor naive soul.

More stories will follow as I remember them.